Art

from left:Sequoia, Rissa, Katelin, and Ashley

I've started writing a few times and deleted it because my writing reads like an industrial manual these days. My brain is full to bursting and my thoughts come out as short, dull, declarative sentences, dry as toast. EVERYTHING IS HAPPENING. EVERYTHING HAS TO BE HANDLED. EVERYTHING IS URGENT. I feel like I have changed into an entirely different person this year. My inner heart and mind are totally new. I feel like I'm going through some sort of puberty or something.

Yesterday was the Art Fest, and I ran the Block of Art this year. This is where, for a $3 donation to the Hamburg Area Arts Alliance, the kids get to paint inside a little square on the street. It was rainy and cold, but I had lots of volunteers to help me, so nothing was too difficult. I just ADORE the little kids. Each one is magnificent. The adults flap and fret and get upset over the silliest things, I just have to laugh at them. "Oh! I'm so MAD because a vendor is in the wrong spot! Oh, huff and puff!" Adults these days are just so absorbed in bullshit. They find the most ridiculous things important. I'm really tired of them. I only want to be around young people.

Sequoia ran the community mural and played the ukulele.

I spent an hour sitting on the curb, talking very seriously with Rissa's dad. When was the last time I sat on a curb, talking? Probably not since my Lark St days, as a teenager. Rissa's mom left. Everyone has lawyered up. It is very sad. I love everyone involved.

Two weeks until my little art show. I plan to spend a good amount of time painting today. A lady at the art festival said she would buy christmas cards of my church painting, so I've got to remember to have those made. I've got a website to do that. I am also teaching a four part comic book art class at the library this June, and yesterday the local movie theater lady approached me to do three "Movie and Craft Project" programs over the summer. I get to pick the movie! Look at me now, USC Film School! This little street fair is becoming a hub for professional networking, it seems. What are the most amazing kids movies ever? I know what I like is probably not going to attract kids...like The Last Unicorn! And make a unicorn horn! That would be cool, but kids probably want what is popular right now...Trolls? I haven't seen that. I should check it. Hiyao Miazaki....yes please! Totoro? Ponyo? or NEVER ENDING STORY?! Ghostbusters? Eighties movies were just better.

I am going to have to start being more selective with the projects that I accept, because things are so crazy. Right now, I am just accepting every offer...babysitting, selling pears, pear events, art classes, commissions, whatever...the answer is always YES! I am going to have to steer my ship a little bit more, but I don't know how. I'm a little afraid to turn anyone down, but I'm going to have to have some order if I don't want my brain to explode.

I am thinking that I might edit out selling pears, which is regular money, but dull.  I like doing the work, but the company puts me in a storage room and pays me shit. But, it is regular money! You see? How do you cut stuff? I've got to be the captain, though. I can't let my life trample over me.

See? I'm boring. Sorry.

Love and light,
Your friend,
Hil